Wednesday, May 31, 2006

feeling not so good

'Can't believe that half of 2006 is almost over...can anybody stop time??? I'm gonna be turning 28 sometime soon...and I'm still loveless....WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

Well ok...I may not be loveless...I know I've got friends and family who love me (I would like to think...hehe!) what I mean is that I still have no romance in my life....WOE IS ME!!! I know I'm sounding really pathetic...but I can't help it T.T Where oh where could my destino be??? HEHEHE!

Guess what...I'm chickening out...I won't be auditioning for Philippine Idol. Based on the reaction of most people when I mentioned that I am planning on trying it out...I figured I may not be as a good a singer as I believed I was...hehe! Most of them were surprised and unsure whether it was such a good idea...I bet some thought I was crazy...well I guess I was a bit crazy for thinking that I have a shot...hehe!

Wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh my life right now is horrible...I feel so old...I think I better head off to bed. Wish today would be better than yesterday.

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Where I'm goin....Guilin, China ^^ (pray for me)





Tuesday, May 23, 2006

I'll Find a Way

"I'll Find A Way" (Rachael Yamagata)

I'll find a way to see you again
I'll find a way to see you again

I used to think that anything I'd do
Wouldn't matter at all anyway
But now I find that when it comes to you
I'm the winner of cards I can't play
Wait for me, wait for me
Darling, I need you desperately, desperately here

And I'll find a way to see you again
And I'll find a way to see you again

The rain is like an orchestra to me
Little gifts from above meant to say
Girl, you falling at his feet
Isn't lovely or stunning today
Wait with me, wait with me
I'm alive when you're here with me, here with me, stay

And I'll find a way to see you again
And I'll find a way to see you again

Why do the street lamps die
When you're passing by
Like a hand that won't stay on my shoulder tonight
If you held me close, would you laugh it away
Would you dare the glance that I steal to stay

And I'll find a way to see you again
Yes, I'll find a way to see you again
I'll find a way, a way, a way to see you again
I'll find a way, a way, a way to see you again
I'll find a way, a way, a way to see you again

The rain will bring, the rain will bring, the rain will bring, bring, bring me down
The rain will bring, the rain will bring, the rain will bring, bring, bring me down
The rain will bring, the rain will bring, the rain will bring, bring, bring me down

Wednesday, May 17, 2006

to audition or not to audition

Would you think I'm crazy if I tell you that I'm gonna audition for Philippine Idol??? Since I started watching American Idol (around three years ago) I promised myself that when I get the chance to audition for the show I'm gonna grab the opportunity to show the country or even the world what I can do...well the opportunity has come and I think I'm gonna take the risk of being laughed at and rejected.

Music has always been my first love and singing is one thing I would want to do for the rest of my life...since this is gonna be the last year that I'm gonna be eligible for the contest (their age limit is 28...I'm turning 28 this year) I know I have to take this opportunity...this may be my last shot for fulfilling my ambition of being a singer. Im sorry...I know it sounds like I've gone nuts...maybe I have...haha!

I am excited...but I'm more terrified than excited. I guess my biggest fear would be finding out that that what I have always considered as my greatest asset (which is my talent in singing) may not be great at all. I don't know...I grew up hearing other people say that I sing well...I'm worried they may be wrong...or perhaps they were just being nice.

WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH part of me wants to fulfill my dream and audition...the other part is screaming out at me telling me not to make a big fool out of myself....WAHHHHHHH....
WHAT DO I DO????

Sunday, May 14, 2006

long time no blog

It's been a while since I last wrote an entry in here. Been busy with life...hehe!

These past two weeks have been action packed. Last week, a colleague friend of mine almost died...I had to rush to the hospital early in the morning after getting news from my other friend that our colleague had been stabbed and was in a critical condition. While I was driving to the hospital I couldn't figure out why I was rushing to the hospital...I don't usually do these kinds of stuff...I'm usually detached but I guess I felt kinda responsible for him...him being on my team and knowing that his family was in the province. When I got there Lorraine...my closest friend in the office was already there...apparently she was the first person the hospital contacted since her number was the only number they found in his wallet...and apparently she's been calling me since five in the morning...It's a good thing my phone was on silence mode otherwise I'd be rushing to the hospital at 5 in the morning. Anyway...when I saw Lorraine there I realized why I was there...God was actually using us to minister to our colleague...he's in a bit of a sticky situation (really sticky situation!!!) I think...him knowing that there are people like Lorraine and I who would be ready to help...he'll probably start seeing the light. By the way...this happened a day before our company trip to the beach...big big spoiler!

After this drama we were off to the beach...YAY!!! It was fun swimming and hanging out with my friends. It would have been nicer though if we got to stay there longer.
***
Today is Mother's day. I feel terrible for not being able to buy a present for Mama...was short on cash...so I just painted some flowers for her...I'm not sure whether she liked it...she probably thought I was so cheap. When I gave it to her she just said she prefered sunflowers...guess she wasn' t very happy about it. I promised her I'd make it up to her after I get my salary. WAAAAAHHHHHH I feel awful for always running out of cash...I gotta stop worrying...in two months I'll be able to complete my payment for my phone.
Leeron and Zeth had their singing and dancing debut in church. They sang with the kid's choir for their mother's day presentation. They were sooooooooooooo cute!!! Being their teacher I felt sooooooo proud seeing them enjoying what they were doing...kinda reminded me of when I was still young singing with the kid's choir in church *sighs* I'm feeling old again...hehe!